The Industry & Idol (and all the things people should already know when auditioning for this show!!)

It’s March, and while for most that means basketball madness, for me it means weeding out the losers on American Idol! The making of the top 24 this year was an interesting process to watch. First, there was such a backlash the past couple years about picking talent that wasn’t “raw” – more seasoned performers were making the cut, and as a result, we started to see some very polished performances. Next, FOX was charged with favoritism by promoting some contestants strongly in the audition rounds while ignoring others – and then when put to the American vote, it was SO shocking that people voted for the those who had the most previous air-time!

This season it seems that AI has taken this into account, because the performances so far have been…pretty pathetic. Raw talent it IS – and we’ve gotten stories on most of them (though still some more than others). The more that I watch this show, the more I’m surprised at how the contestants don’t seem to GET it. Like, the largish, emo African American guy didn’t understand why he didn’t make the top 24? I was yelling at the TV, “Dude! You’re a large black guy, and they already took the guy whose wife had a baby during Hollywood week! There’s a quota!” And that continued. White girls lamenting that they are awesome and why didn’t they get picked? Because there are four other blonde girls that look just like you! That’s why! And you were like #5, we can’t put in another cute blonde girl or America won’t be able to differentiate between them!

Another issue I have with contestants is how they do NOT seem to get, no matter the YEARS of footage available to them, that this show is about BEING A BOX. America wants you to be something standard, packaged and easily digested every week. Until we get bored with you. Then we want you to do something "daring" and "creative" and "original." Seriously. I really think people who to be on American Idol should hire me as their coach on what to do with the package and whatnot. I know they have people there to coach you, but they are all supposed to be impartial and crap. I'll support whoever wants me to represent them.

What we learned from round one – the Hispanic community does not watch American Idol. Pour Joe. He was actually pretty good. Probably my second favorite of the night, and alas, no one voted for him (perhaps because he spoke in Spanish at the end of his montage?). I felt less bad about Latino girl, who really DID suck, so that’s not America’s fault, but you’re gorgeous and you should have given us a reason to keep you around. My read – girls, it’s a toss up and mainly a popularity contest at this point unless you're Crystal. Guys, it’s a clear top half/bottom half scenario and I don’t expect too many surprises there, other than the young awkward guys will probably put themselves in a position to be the Elliot or the Chris R. of this season.

Let’s see who goes home tonight…my guess is Haeley, Lacey (who both deserve it) or Michelle (who I don’t think deserves it…just what I think America will do…) and one the guy’s side, I’m pretty sure John and Jermaine are gone, though it could also be Tim since he got the reverse Simon mojo this week.

And what’s with all the weird sexual innuendo this season? Ellen comparing a male contestant to an unripe banana, and Simon saying a performance was limp and unmemorable, kind of like our host? It’s a new level of catty. Bring it on! Plus, this whole cougar thing with Kara kind of disturbs me in ways I can't yet put my finger on, but more on that later.